Palm Trees & Dragonfly Dreams

when do you know your at the end of the proverbial rope? when do you tie your knot? When do you wake up in the morning with tears already formed in your eyes. What is your breaking point? Have you been there? how do you rise up? how do you pull yourself up by the bootstraps and take that next step? Me???? I really have NO idea. because I live on this island I now call those things my 'waves' you all have seen my posts about riding the waves that come my way...well here is another wave.... I am secretly glad you cannot see my crazy face as I am crying away madly when I type and pour my heart out.... think back to when you were a child and someone pushed you high and fast on the swings...OH how your heart raced and your blood pumped and you were scared! and yet you dealt with it and did it again. wow how brave you were! What about the first time you rode a roller coaster? that first dip took your heart right up into your mouth didn't it?? then the ...

When babies are born they cry to be nursed (and nurtured) Nate was no different in that respect. Nate cried because he was HUNGRY . and I tried and tried to make that painful cry stop. you know that cry. I know you do. the cry when a newborn is hungry the cry when you toddler wakes up and is hungry that deep in my belly because I am starving mommay.... the hungry cry Nate has fought this and other battles his whole life. And sometimes I can only just 'ride the wave' of pain I feel in my heart This month is a new milestone. and I am torn, do I celebrate or do I cry? This month my child that has been HUNGRY FROM BIRTH STARVING yes UNSATISFIED HUNGER is  NOW ABLE TO  TELL ME!! 'MOMMAY, I HUNGREE, I WEEAWLY WEEAWLY HUNGREE." *tears, as my already broken heart cracks again from the pain of the word.... HUNGRY